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February 28 Dear im' not mysterious at allDear Tent,
I am not mysterious. I didn't hide or escape.
I am where I am: appear at the workplace in the late morning everyday and come back home at the early night;
sometimes hang out with my workmates, sometimes with my old friends, sometimes with i myself.
Days pass without surprises or shocks. JOB is merely a job. I need a better cause to stay vivid.
Though I log on MSN once i start computer, i found no reason to appear online. Just got nothing to share with all those names.
I think the way i appear cold or mysterious is rooted in my nonconfidence. I might not be the same person in your imagination.
I don't have so much to share.
Since i can see the direction between me and others at the early beginning, i choose to keep a distance.
To protect myself and leave others no burden. Peace, huh?
Maybe it's those hatred still stay deep in my heart so that i can't laugh out my own happiness, smile at my own satisfaction, or enjoy my own life.
Being numb for so long a time that i didn't even remember i am still young.
It's only a year.
But things are turning bright, everything. Z.Z texted me today. After all these years.
He acknowledged me that he returned to SH. In the same city as you.
These days the air in SZ smells exactly like that in Shanghai's early summer, when we both started our doomed relations.
Suddenly i miss your city. Despite all those memories she brought me, good or bad. I miss it.
I can even see that we meet at a little Cafe in a certain street, amid the sweet smell of gardenia;
and i can see Z.Z in white shirt, wearing a pure large smile, and those shimmering eyes.
I want to visit Shanghai, visit the youth i left there.
Looking forward to meeting you soon.
yours, Trix
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